Who's Bailin'? Palin!

I always try to think logically, so when I heard Sarah Palin was resigning as governor of Alaska, I figured she had a good reason for stepping down. Sure, she claimed it was part of her strategy to achieve a "higher calling," but I couldn't buy that; going from a Governor to a citizen isn't a good strategy to achieve power. I figured this was all bull, and there would be an upcoming scandal.

But as the days go by, it looks like she has no good reason for quitting. So I guess I erred by thinking Ms. Palin would act rationally. Then again, she has always been a bit nutty, and thus I should know by now that she does crazy shit for no good reason. Think about it: this is a woman with all sorts of insane religious beliefs. For christsake, she has associations with a church that speaks in tongues, which is not an activity that sane people typically perform.

So it shouldn't be the least bit surprising when someone with such a loose grip on reality does something that makes so little sense. Still, it's also the best decision she ever made. Palin wrote on the Twitter that her resignation would be "in Alaska's best interest," and for maybe the first time ever, I agree with her.

Appearing On The Next Episode Of "Cops"

Even some Christians will admit that church is usually boring. Maybe that was on this Texas pastor's mind when he got in an entertaining feud with the police:

Police used a Taser on a pastor and pepper spray to disperse his congregants Wednesday after the pastor allegedly interfered with a traffic stop in the church parking lot.

Congregants say they were in the Iglesia Profetica Peniel church for an early morning prayer when pastor Jose Elias Moran went to assist the stopped driver, a church member, by asking the police what had happened.

An incident report on the Webster police department's Web site said Officer Raymond Berryman tried to calm Moran and arrest him. But police say he pushed the officer, went inside the church and returned with 40 other congregants.

The congregants say Moran fled into the church when the officer grew angry and began to yell, and Moran's family disputes that the pastor touched the officer.

Thou Shalt Eat Inhumanely Slaughtered Animals

In addition to depriving themselves of lobster, people who eat a kosher diet are also but contributing to animal cruelty, according to a British report:

Religious slaughter techniques practised by Jews and Muslims are cruel and should be ended, says a scientific assessment from the Government's animal welfare advisers.

The Farm Animal Welfare Council says that slitting the throats of the animals most commonly used for meat, chickens, without stunning, results in "significant pain and distress". The committee, which includes scientific, agricultural and veterinary experts, is calling for the Government to launch a debate with Muslim and Jewish communities to end the practice.

So people who stay kosher presumably believe God commands them to eat inhumanely slaughtered animals. That makes a whole lot of sense.

Get Your War On

Happy 4th of July, my fellow Americans! Unfortunately, the holiday is in jeopardy this year. As Stephen Colbert explains, a War on Independence Day is being waged by a Jesus-hating environmentalist:

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
4th of July Under Attack
http://www.colbertnation.com/
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Jeff Goldblum

I never knew Jesus was a Founding Father; surely my secular public education is to blame.

Sarah's Messiah Complex

Todd S. Purdum's new Vanity Fair piece on Sarah Palin is well worth checking up. Needless to say, it is less than complimentary. Take a look at this, for instance:

More than once in my travels in Alaska, people brought up, without prompting, the question of Palin’s extravagant self-regard. Several told me, independently of one another, that they had consulted the definition of “narcissistic personality disorder” in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders—“a pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy”—and thought it fit her perfectly. When Trig was born, Palin wrote an e-mail letter to friends and relatives, describing the belated news of her pregnancy and detailing Trig’s condition; she wrote the e-mail not in her own name but in God’s, and signed it “Trig’s Creator, Your Heavenly Father.”

It's frightening to think that she and McCain were leading in the polls for a short while.

Another thing I noticed is that the Palin defenders don't know how to handle this article. They can't rebut what it says, so they are lamely playing the "liberal bias" card.

Unicorn Tattoos!

I thought I'd get back to this blog's roots by displaying some unicorn tats from this list of "30 Awesomely Bad Unicorn Tattoos." Here are a few that could be interpreted as being very disturbing versions of the Invisible Pink Unicorn herself:



I'd love to meet sort of persons who asks themselves "What sort of tattoo should I get? A unicorn banging a dolphin doggy style, or a rainbow-decked, neo-Nazi unicorn?"

These two below don't look like the IPU, but they're kick ass all the same:


Who knew unicorns could be so disturbing?

That Wacky Creationism Museum

The Creation Museum in Petersburg, Kentucky, is truly a haven of learning. It teaches such facts that the Universe is just over 6,000 years old and that dinosaurs lived side-by-side with humans a la The Flintstones. Basically, it's one of the most anti-scientific -- or maybe pro-pseudo scientific -- places in the country. So when a group of paleontologists visited, wackiness was bound to ensue:

The worlds of academic paleontology and creationism rarely collide, but the former paid a visit to the latter last Wednesday. The University of Cincinnati was hosting the North American Paleontological Convention, where scientists presented their latest research at the frontiers of the ancient past. In a break from the lectures, about 70 of the attendees boarded school buses for a field trip to the Creation Museum, on the other side of the Ohio River.

. . .

Terry Mortenson, a lecturer and researcher for Answers in Genesis, the ministry that built and runs the Creation Museum, said he did not expect the visit to change many minds. “I’m sure for the most part they’ll be of a different view from what’s presented here,” Dr. Mortenson said. “We’ll just give the freedom to see what they want to see.”

Near the entrance to the exhibits is an animatronic display that includes a girl feeding a carrot to a squirrel as two dinosaurs stand nearby, a stark departure from natural history museums that say the first humans lived 65 million years after the last dinosaurs.

“I’m speechless,” said Derek E.G. Briggs, director of the Peabody Museum of Natural History at Yale, who walked around with crossed arms and a grimace. “It’s rather scary.”

Dr. Mortenson and others at the museum say they look at the same rocks and fossils as the visiting scientists, but because of different starting assumptions they arrive at different answers. For example, they say the biblical flood set off huge turmoil inside the Earth that broke apart the continents and pushed them to their current locations, not that the continents have moved over a few billion years.

“Everyone has presuppositions what they will consider, what questions they will ask,” said Dr. Mortenson, who holds a doctorate in the history of geology from Coventry University in England. “The very first two rooms of our museum talk about this issue of starting points and assumptions. We will very strongly contest an evolutionist position that they are letting facts speak for themselves.”

And sadly, there are lots of people who agree with Dr. Mortenson:

The museum’s presentation appeals to visitors like Steven Leinberger and his wife, Deborah, who came with a group from the Church of the Lutheran Confession in Eau Claire, Wis. “This is what should be taught even in science,” Mr. Leinberger said.

But the scientists make a rather odd observation: the Creation Museum actually admits that evolution is real!

Dr. Bengtson noted that to explain how the few species aboard the ark could have diversified to the multitude of animals alive today in only a few thousand years, the museum said simply, “God provided organisms with special tools to change rapidly.”

“Thus in one sentence they admit that evolution is real,” Dr. Bengtson said, “and that they have to invoke magic to explain how it works.”

I'm fully with Hemant on Friendly Atheist, who says "Either the Creation Museum supports evolution… or they don’t understand their own beliefs."

Why Religions Cooperate

Christians seem to be getting along better with Muslims these days. For instance, Rick Warren is buddying up to them at an Islamic convention:

Sayyid Syeed remembers an interfaith event several years ago when a Jewish leader went to embrace him, saw someone snapping a photo, then suddenly pulled back.

"He said to the man, `Stop,'" Syeed recalled, "`I'll lose my job.'"

Times have changed for the Islamic Society of North America and for Syeed, who leads the group's interfaith outreach. In a sign of growing acceptance of U.S. Muslims, one of the most prominent religious leaders in the country, evangelical pastor Rick Warren, will speak at the Islamic Society's annual convention this weekend. Representatives from the two largest streams of American Judaism, the Reform and Conservative movements, will also be there to highlight their recently formed partnerships with the Muslim group.

"The landscape of religion in America is changing," Syeed said. "America itself has reached a certain level of fulfillment in terms of diversity of faith."

I agree that these are more tolerant times, but I think the increased cooperation between these religions has as much to do with the rise of secularism. Not so long ago, Christians were so dominant that they could afford to look down at Islam or Judaism. But now the younger generations aren't so eager to adopt the religious beliefs of their parents, and suddenly, Christians are willing to ally with Allah to fight their own irrelevance.

Sanford Is King David

I hope I never get sick of my new hobby of watching Mark Sanford get bashed. And it's so easy to make fun of him, especially when he starts comparing himself to the Biblical King David:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Mark Sanford Consults the Old Testament
http://www.thedailyshow.com/
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Jason Jones in Iran

Pimp My ATV

I just found what would have been the perfect accessory for last Sunday's "Take your gun to church day" (located in Kentucky) -- the Mad Dog® ATV Hand Gun Mount!After you get the hand gun rack set up, all you need is a holder for your whiskey and your Jesus bobble head, and you'll have one pimped out ATV.

Militant Atheists

This guy explains everything you ever wanted to know about militant atheism, but were afraid to ask:

The Rise Of "Theotainment"

Church historian John Mark Yeats thinks that churches have drifted away from their true intentions, and are increasingly focusing on entertainment, which he calls "theotainment." This started in the 1960's and 1970's, when churches started reaching out to kids:

Big churches created bigger stand-alone youth programs, then children’s programs wired to please these media-trained consumers. Youth programs developed their own music, education and preaching, all driven by the style and content of entertainment culture.

Then these young people became adults and began to build and operate their own churches, argue Yeats and seminary colleague Thomas White in their sobering book, “Franchising McChurch.” For churches that want to grow, the evolving approach to faith that White and Yeats call “theotainment” seems like the only game in town.

“Think of countless children’s ministries across the United States. ... Most children’s Sunday schools quit reading and studying the Bible long ago. Instead, children view cartoon adaptations of the text along with numerous activities that keep them entertained while Mom and Dad worship without distraction,” argue White and Yeats, who have worked in local churches, as well as classrooms.

This strategy is cranked up another notch in youth ministries. In many communities, the “religiously oriented youth, savvy shoppers that they are, simply attend the church that has the greatest concentration of entertaining events. ... If they buy into Christianity through entertainment, the show must go on to keep them engaged.”

This has been going on for decades, noted Yeats. The “Jesus rock” of the ’70s moved out of music festivals and into Sunday services. This created a “contemporary Christian music” industry that helped churches go from one cultural style to the next, while striving to find their stylistic niches — like stations on an FM radio dial.

Sanctuaries turned into auditoriums and, finally, into theaters with semi-professional sound systems and the video screens preachers needed to display all of those DVD clips that connected with modern audiences.

Sure, "theotainment" cheapens the Christian experience, but as far as I'm concerned, that's not such a bad thing.

Sanford & Sin

More details are emerging about what a huge hypocrite South Carolina's Governor Sanford is:

Each Sunday afternoon in May, Gov. Mark Sanford and his wife hosted five other couples at the executive mansion for a spiritual "boot camp." Topics discussed during the hour-and-a-half-long sessions included forgiveness and "not loving your wife as Christ loved the church."

Group leader Warren "Cubby" Culbertson did not tell the other four couples what he and his wife, Susan, had known for months: The governor was having an affair with a woman in Argentina.

. . .

In an interview with The Associated Press this weekend at his Columbia office, just blocks from the State House, Culbertson said he believed his friend when he said that this was his only marital transgression. He thinks Sanford was simply caught off guard by "the power of darkness."

Culbertson also thinks that the only thing holding his friends' marriage together right now is "their vow to God."

"Because it's not feelings — it's not emotions," Culbertson said, the smile fading from his tanned face. "For most Christians, at some point in your marriage, if you're married long enough, you do it because that's what we're called to do — out of obedience instead of out of passion. And I think that's where Mark and Jenny are right now."

To be honest, I'm finding it delightful to watch this asshole squirm. And better yet, he's harming his party's relationship with evangelicals.

Bring Your Gun To Church Day

If you love God and guns and live in Kentucky, today was your wet dream:

A gun-toting Kentucky pastor says it's OK to bring weapons to church — at least for one day.

Ken Pagano asked his flock to bring their unloaded handguns — in holsters — to New Bethel Church in Louisville for a celebration of the Second Amendment of the U.S. Constitution that guarantees the right to bear arms.

More than 200 people answered his call. There was just one rule for the several dozen who brought their guns along: No bullets.

Wait, no bullets? Come on, if you really love the Second Amendment, you would bring a loaded assault rifle to God's house. Sorry, but this is really half-assed.

We'll Always Have The Jesus Juice

Like most people, I was sad to see Michael Jackson had died, even though he was one of the creepiest people on the planet. He left a highly mixed legacy: on the one hand, he was one of the most talented performers of his lifetime, but on the other hand, he was very possibly a child molester.

Oh well, I'll try to remember the good times: the "Thriller" music video, Bubbles the monkey, moonwalking, and of course, Jesus Juice. I plan on toasting Jackson's life tonight with a heaping cupful of the concoction. I'm hoping everyone else of legal drinking age will do the same.

Gay Exorcism Time

How's this for an enlightened view of homosexuality?

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

This edition of the video is actually censored. Here is some of what's missing:

"Come out of his belly," someone commands. "It's in the belly — push."

Later, the teenager is back on the floor, breathing heavily. Then he's coughing and apparently vomiting into a bag.

"Get another bag," a participant says. "Make sure you have your gloves."

As the youth lay back on the ground, limp, church members put a white sheet over him.

One of the church's Reverends, Patricia McKinney, has been put on the defensive over the exorcism, saying:

"It's been a hard time for me, but I'm looking good and I'm standing strong because when you have a mandate like mine you're not going to say what you want without the adversary coming after you," she said. "If you are a true prophet you're not going to be popular with the people."

And if you're a total idiot, you're not going to be popular either.

Mark Sanford's Wild Ride Of Hypocrisy

For the second time this month, a prominent, moralistic politician has been caught cheating on his wife. This is one of the more interesting cases of marital infidelity you'll ever hear: the Governor of South Carolina disappeared from work for a week -- he wasn't on vacation, he just left -- and told his staffers he was hiking, but he actually went on a South America tryst:

After going AWOL for seven days, Gov. Mark Sanford admitted Wednesday that he'd secretly flown to Argentina to visit a woman with whom he'd been having an affair. He apologized to his wife and four sons and said he will resign as head of the Republican Governors Association.

"I've let down a lot of people, that's the bottom line," the 49-year-old governor said at a news conference where he choked up as he ruminated with remarkable frankness on God's law, moral absolutes and following one's heart. His family did not attend.

The woman, who lives in Argentina, has been a "dear, dear friend" for about eight years but, Sanford said, the relationship didn't become romantic until a little over a year ago. He's seen her three times since then, and his wife found out about it five months ago.

As an added bonus, several emails between Sanford and his mistress, "Maria," have been discovered. Here is an excerpt from a June 10, 2008 message from Sanford, where he proves middle aged Republicans really do have a romantic side:

You have a particular grace and calm that I adore. You have a level of sophistication that is so fitting with your beauty. I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificently gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines or that I love the curves of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of night’s light — but hey, that would be going into the sexual details we spoke of at the steakhouse at dinner — and unlike you I would never do that!

I might feel bad for the guy if he didn't support the impeachment of Bill Clinton. And all these years after leaving office, we might have finally found Clinton's true legacy: exposing hypocrites. Sanford is only the latest in a long list of people -- John Ensign and Newt Gingrich prominent among them -- who condemned Clinton's infidelity, but have since been busted as cheaters themselves.

However, when you think about it, what Sanford did was much worse than what Clinton did. When Clinton was receiving oral pleasure, he was working late into the night, and he never even took a break from talking business on the phone. Sanford, on the other hand, went AWOL from his job and left the continent. Say what you about Clinton, but at least he put his duties as president ahead of his extramarital affairs.

Ahmadinejad's Last Stand?

If Ahmadinejad and his cleric pals hold onto power in Iran, its future as a theocracy is still in doubt:

Even if all protests are repressed, Ayatollah Khamenei is now in the impossible position of having to support a President whose authority is not accepted by much of the governing structure itself - even the rather extremist Majlis speaker Ali Larijani has declared that the vote-counting was biased.

Therefore, Mr. Ahmadinejad cannot really function as President even if he remains in office - the Majlis is unlike to confirm his ministerial appointments. If, therefore, Ayatollah Khamenei is not removed by the Assembly of Experts, and Mr. Ahmadinejad is not removed by Ayatollah Khamenei, the government will continue to be paralyzed. That will only accelerate the erosion of the machinery of clerical rule.
Iran's great good fortune is that below that rule, the essential democratic institutions are up and running, and need only new elections for both the Majlis and the presidency.

Sound encouraging. But all sorts of atrocities could be committed in the transition.

Bat Mitzvahs Gone Wild

In my lifetime, I've been obligated to attend more than my share of bar and bat mitzvahs. I can safely say that none were as interesting as this one:

Police had to clear an "out of control" bat mitzvah party Saturday night at the Lockwood-Mathews Mansion Museum (seen above).

Brian Fischer, rental coordinator for the museum, told police the younger guests at the Jewish ceremony, which celebrates a girl's coming of age, tore out ceiling tiles and a light fixture in the 141-year-old, 62-room mansion. Fischer said he saw several boys and girls engaging in oral sex in the bathrooms, Officer Carleton Giles said.

A Wilton man, reportedly intoxicated, was charged with resisting arrest.

After Fischer could not bring the party to order, he called police shortly after 11 p.m., Giles said.

The first officer said he walked into the main room of the mansion, bought by the city of Norwalk in 1941 and saw about 150 guests.

"The party appeared to be out of control, with kids running up and down the stairs and through the rooms," the report said.

And the allegations get seedier:

Sheryl Finnie Baker, who rented the mansion for her daughter's bat mitzvah, said the reports are "blown way out of proportion." Fischer overreacted, she said, and to say the party was out of control is ridiculous.

"All I knew was that I was dancing, and then there were five police cars outside," Baker said.

No one told her the kids were upstairs or that there were allegations involving oral sex, she said. She saw no inappropriate behavior in the bathrooms, she said.

When I went to these celebrations, they were always so boring. A typical highlight would have been a lame DJ playing a Vanilla Ice song. I was always relieved I never had to have a bar mitzvah, but if I knew I could have an "out of control" one, I would have been in Hebrew school the next day.

Report: Scientology Leaders Physically Abusive

As if there weren't already enough reasons to not become a Scientologist, reports are surfacing that the leaders in the cult like to get violent with their underlings:

The leader of the Church of Scientology struck his subordinates numerous times and set an example for physical violence among the tightly controlled religion's management team, four former high-ranking executives told a newspaper for a story published Sunday.

The executives who have since left the organization told The St. Petersburg Times that they witnessed David Miscavige, chairman of the board that oversees the church, hit staff members dozens of times, often without warning.

"It was random and whimsical. It could be the look on your face. Or not answering a question quickly. But it always was a punishment," said Mike Rinder, who oversaw the church's legal and media relations operations. Rinder said he was hit many times by Miscavige and that he also hit others before leaving in 2007.

. . .

Tom De Vocht, who for years oversaw the church's spiritual headquarters in Clearwater, estimated that during one three-year period, he saw Miscavige strike staffers as many as 100 times. He left in 2005.

De Vocht also participated, explaining to the newspaper how he rationalized his actions: "If I don't attack, I'm going to be attacked. It's a survival instinct in a weird situation that no one should be in."

Has anyone ever been to a humanist or atheist meeting and been attacked for not adequately refuting Pascal's Wager?

Banning The Burka

France is mulling over a burka ban:

The French National Assembly announced Tuesday the creation of an inquiry into whether women in France should be allowed to wear the burka, one day after President Nicolas Sarkozy controversially told lawmakers that the traditional Muslim garment was "not welcome" in France.

A cross-party panel of 32 lawmakers will investigate whether the traditional Muslim garment poses a threat to the secular nature of the French constitution. They are due to report back with their recommendations in six months.

Last week 57 lawmakers -- led by communist legislator Andre Gerin -- signed a petition calling for a study into the feasibility of legislation to ban the burka in public places.

Wow, imagine if American politicians talked like this (and I didn't know there were communist legislators in France either either). But according to the proponents of a ban, the ban isn't xenophobic; instead, it's about women's rights:

"The problem of the burka is not a religious problem. This is an issue of a woman's freedom and dignity. This is not a religious symbol. It is a sign of subservience; it is a sign of lowering. I want to say solemnly, the burka is not welcome in France," Sarkozy told lawmakers.

I don't know what will happen if the burka ban passes, though all hell could break loose. What I do know is that all paranoid, terrorist-fearing Americans should hope that Sarkozy gets his way, because it will drop the United States down a notch on the list of targets.

Impersonating Christian Protesters

As part of a viral marketing campaign, the makers of Dante's Inferno, an upcoming video game that takes place in Hell, staged a mock Christian protest. It's convincing for the most part:



The whole thing is sort of stupid, but it's actually bother some religious groups enough that they are protesting the fake protest.

Captain Kirk Is Muhammad

A Muslim author sees a lot in common between Muhammad and Star Trek's Captain Kirk:

Prophet Muhammad would have loved Star Trek. Muhammad would have admired Captain Kirk for the same reasons that Muhammad's followers admired him. Muhammad was a social reformer in 7th century Arabia, and Captain Kirk was a social reformer in space. Oh, Captain Kirk was supposed to be following the Prime Directive, but he managed significant social reform on all those planets. He once stopped centuries of warfare by showing that computerized brutality was still brutality. Human beings are barbaric, he said, but we can wake up every morning and say to ourselves, 'You know, I don't think I'll kill anyone today. Not today.'"

Like Captain Kirk, Muhammad reformed society by limiting violence. He outlawed all forms of warfare except the jihad, which is the use of force in self-defense to overthrow an oppressor.

He also established an egalitarian social structure. He advocated a pluralism that was unvalued in his time. The first muezzin of Islam was a freed Ethiopian slave. Muhammad had family connections who were Christian, Jewish, and pagan. In his last sermon, Muhammad famously proclaimed that no one had superiority over another, not a white man over a black man, not a black man over a white man, not an Arab over a non-Arab, not a non-Arab over an Arab. And the Qur'an says that God could have made us all into one religious community, but instead made us into different nations and tribes so that we would learn from one another.

And the comparisons get increasingly far fetched:

Muhammad and the Qur'an were feminist, too, believe it or not. Together, they gave women more rights in the 7th century than any other legal system in the world did at the time. In fact, Islam gave women more rights than Englishwomen would have for another thousand years. Jane Austen's heroines would actually have fared better under Islamic law than English law.

Islam, like Star Trek, established a feminist model that could be built upon later. Muslims have a duty to build upon this model. They haven't nearly done enough in the last few centuries. For one thing, they've been hampered by socioeconomic and political obstacles (colonization being a big one). Today, though, many Muslims groups and individuals are working to promote women's rights and human rights from an Islamic perspective. That's what Muhammad, despite the limitations of his premodern society, tried to do.

All I know is that I'd rather have William Shatner as my divine prophet.

Father's Day Question

Would Jesus spend the day with Joseph or with God? Or does he have to do something with both of them?

Either way, he would have no problem with finding a present. For example, he could use his carpentry skills to build a killer tie rack.

M.C. (Man Of Christ) Hammer

What, do you ask, is M.C. Hammer (pictured above in action figure form) up to these days?

He's now a minister (the "M.C." now stands for "Man of Christ"), which earns him extra cash for officiating weddings of other faded pop-culture icons, such as Corey Feldman and Vince Neil. But things may be looking up for the MC: his new TV show "Hammertime," which chronicles his struggle to relaunch his empire with the help of his wife of 24 years and their six kids, debuts June 19 on A&E.

I wonder if he preaches in his puffy pants, because that would be sweet.

Actually, Hammer isn't the only rapper to become a minister. There's also Mase (A.K.A. Mase Murder), who was big in the late 90's with the albums Harlem World and Double Up, the latter of which contained one of my favorite songs, "Fuck Me, Fuck You." But Mase's bad boy image changed when he was born again after claiming to have a vision that he was leading people into Hell. With those flawless credentials, he's been a successful pastor for nearly a decade.

Then there's the late Ol' Dirty Bastard. While he was never officially a minister, he did go by the name Big Baby Jesus for a while, and that has got to count for something.

No Spikes In Church Attendance

There's a myth going around that the recession is causing church attendance to swell. The data suggests otherwise:

According to Frank Newport, the editor-in-chief of Gallup Poll, which interviews 30,000 Americans every month, “to guess that attendance would increase [in recessions] is a common-sense assumption with no basis in data.” John Green, a senior fellow at the Pew Forum on Religion and Public Life, which recently published a study on the correlation between church attendance and economics, has found no link in the past 20 years.

That's not to say church attendance isn't affected by traumatic events and disasters (my italics):

Mr Green says that real spikes in attendance have occurred only in times of national disaster, such as September 11th 2001, or the Cuban missile crisis. Mr Newport goes even further, noting that, after September 11th, there was only a short-term blip in attendance. Evidently, this recession is “not providing a society-wide worry about the future.”

This information suggests that some people only go to religious services when they're panicking. Once they calm down a little, they tone down their magical thinking and stay away from church.

The Poorly Received Scientology Marketing Blitz

The Church of Scientology is currently running "a multi-million dollar media campaign that includes running ads on news sites, satellite dish networks, 37 cable stations, and even Wired.com." Here's one of their typical ads:


If you're like me and are thinking "what the hell was that?" you have a lot of company.

All of the Scientology commercials are so generic they could be for anything. But that's understandable, because if they talked about the actual aspects of their religion -- thetans, Xenu, e-meters, Tom Cruise, and John Travolta -- they would really freak everyone out.

Calvinism's Big Birthday (And Why Not To Celebrate)

The 500th birthday of John Calvin, the founder of Calvinism, will be coming up on July 10th to much fanfare. But if ever a birthday should be mourned instead of celebrated, it would be Calvin's. His legacy is creating a breed of Christianity that is among the most sadistic ever thought up. Just look at his tortured followers today:

Like most 24-year-old men, Stephen Jones is keenly interested in sin. But while many of his peers enjoy their youthful indiscretions, Jones takes a more, shall we say, Puritanical stand.

Last weekend (June 12-15), Jones and 4,000 other young Christians packed into a convention center in Palm Springs, Calif., to hear preachers tell them that they are totally depraved, incapable of doing the right thing without a mighty hand from God, and -- most importantly-- have absolutely no control over their eternal fate.

The mind behind that message is John Calvin, the 16th-century Reformer often better known for condemning sinners and heretics than for igniting evangelical zeal. But as Presbyterian and other Reformed churches prepare for the 500th birthday of their spiritual godfather on July 10, increasingly, it is young American evangelicals who are taking up his theological torch.

"His theology is the hottest, most explosive thing being discussed right now," said Justin Taylor, 32, a self-described Calvinist, and an editorial director at Crossway, a Christian publisher in the evangelical heartland of Wheaton, Ill. "What he taught is extraordinarily influential right now."

Young evangelicals are scooping up books by neo-Calvinist authors, packing churches and conventions led by Calvinist preachers and studying at staunchly Calvinist seminaries. They're blogging their way through Calvin's behemoth Institutes of the Christian Religion, setting up Facebook fan clubs and opening Twitter feeds.

This is how predestination -- the signature feature of Calvinism -- works:

. . . The Calvinist belief that Jesus died only for an elect few and that humans can do nothing to earn their eternal reward has split Christians for centuries, said Peter J. Thuesen, a professor and author of a forthcoming book called Predestination: The American Career of a Contentious Doctrine.

"That idea has upset so many different religious groups, the backlash against it gave rise to some of the denominational diversity in the United States," as churches split from each other over predestination debates, said Thuesen.

So if you believe this predestination shit, you believe that God has decided who goes to heaven and hell before that person is even born. I don't know why this idea is appealing to the young evangelical crowd, though it does prove how depraved they are.

In another 500 years, I hope Calvinism will be discarded to the garbage heap of forgotten and failed religions.

Huckabee's Favorite Subject

Everyone's favorite fundamentalist, Mike Huckabee, discusses abortion here with Jon Stewart. It's interesting how little Huckabee talks about religion in his arguments; probably a smart choice for a Daily Show audience.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Mike Huckabee
http://www.thedailyshow.com/
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Jason Jones in Iran

Ensign Won't Resign

I've been calling the sexually promiscuous Sen. Ensign a hypocrite, but I won't anymore. I'm upgrading him to a super-mega-hypocrite:

For much of his public career, Sen. John Ensign has appeared a model of the religious right. By this week, he had become just another politician diminished by scandal.

Rattled, humbled and alone at the podium, Ensign acknowledged to reporters an extramarital affair, the sort of moral failing he's criticized in the past.

The Nevada Republican once called on President Bill Clinton to resign, declaring "the truth must come out." In October 2007, he was sharply critical of former Sen. Larry Craig, of Idaho, calling the Republican's arrest in an airport bathroom sex sting "embarrassing for the Senate."

. . .

Ensign's political life was entwined with his religious beliefs. Once in Washington, he lived for a time with other Christian lawmakers who organized prayer breakfasts and Bible study. When in Las Vegas, he continued to attend an Evangelical church in Las Vegas with his wife, Darlene, who did not move to Washington with him.

Ensign has opposed abortion and gay marriage and backed school vouchers.

"He's been a very reliable ally and outspoken on marriage issues, on life issues," said Richard Ziser, a leading religious conservative in the state. "His religious beliefs were a very high identifier with conservatives."

Now, I don't really care about the personal lives of public figures, but I'm making an exception in Ensign's case because he called for Clinton to resign. If he had any dignity, he would follow his suggestion for Clinton.